April Fools' Family Fun!

It's April Fools' Day ... or is it?

Yes, it is. Gotcha, you calendar checking moron!

Started in 1693 as a way of rounding up the stupidest members of society to use as kindling for witch burnings, April Fools' has become a convenient one-day excuse for the horrible way people normally treat each other.

What better time to loosen up and show your family that you're not just the angry, abusive drunk they've become so adept at avoiding after long days at work and sporting events you've wagered on than by playing a few wholesome pranks? Here are some you can try out at home today to tenuously regain your loved ones' belief that a soul resides somewhere inside you.

Made ya look: It's amazing that this zinger still fools people after so many years, but believe me, it does. And the best part is, it's the perfect segue into unleashing all the things that bother you about your loved ones that you've been holding in. You merely point and look to an area behind your family member, asking, "What's that behind you?" Then, imagine their surprise when they turn to see nothing at all. Gets 'em every time! That's when you tell them it's no wonder they can't hold down a job or perform better in school, as they've just demonstrated that they have the cranial capacity of a baby orangutan.

Hey, what's that on your shirt: This one never fails. All you do is point down to an area on your family member's shirt and falsely alert them that there's an unidentified spot or stain that requires attention. Then, when they look down, they'll see that there's not really a stain at all. You've just set their shirt on fire.

Squirting flower: Will this classic ever stop being funny? All you do is pin a fake flower to your lapel (note: be sure you're wearing clothing featuring a lapel). Then, when family members invariably lean in to take a smell, spit in their face. Wait until you see the look they give you!

The Old Switcheroo: This one'll really throw 'em for a loop. Take something your family uses everyday and replace it with something that looks similar. What's that honey, your key isn't working? Could it be because I've switched your front door key with the back door key? LOL! Why does this water taste like bleach? Because it is!

Happy fooling, everyone.

Image via.


Tweet